Friday 2 November
Often, I think, our horses need us to give them more time and space than we realise.
An example of this came up just this morning. I was poo picking in the fields and I noticed that Rika was yawning. She seems to have been finding the transition to Wales more challenging than Dax; but then more of this has been new to her than to him, since she has also left her people, as well as her herd and her place. I hoped that the yawns might mean she was releasing and starting to relax a little more into her new home.
I’d been spending some time scratching Dax and Rika had approached us, so I thought I would offer her some scratches too. At first she seemed uncertain, so I stepped back to get a clearer idea of what she was trying to tell me. I sensed that she was just a little unsure but still open, so I gently took a step forward again. She accepted this so I continued with scratches and a bit of massage. I heard some long, loud gut sounds and it seemed that she was relaxing a little into my touch. I decided to offer some rebalancing of her energies along her bladder meridian. As soon as I started her eyes began to blink, long and slow and I could see that she was working through some stuff. I only got about half way along her neck when she walked away, putting some distance between us. She didn’t stop until she had crossed the gateway into the next field. She stood there for some time, just processing whatever had come up for her.
Part of me would have liked to continue encouraging her to release, and trying to build a bond with her, but I think that to have done so would actually have pushed her further away and perhaps have caused her to shut me out. I knew that my desire to carry on in that moment was coming more from my need than from ‘Rika’s – my need to connect with her and for her to be happy here. A part of me wanted this to happen straight away, rather than allowing ‘Rika to find this balance in her own time. I had to remind myself that horses, like humans, need time to adjust to change. Everything here is new to her – the place, the people, the food, the grass, the ‘herd’ – so it’s a lot to take in. Horses can take up to a year, or even more, to fully settle into a new environment and to really feel comfortable enough to ‘be themselves’. ‘Rika has only been here 3 weeks so I need to be patient and proceed at her pace.
In our human world we are so conditioned to expecting instant results. So many things are at the touch of our fingertips: news, information, entertainment, even food. I’ve been made very aware of our dependence on this due to our lack of internet access following our move, and the remoteness of our new location, which is taking us back to slower ways of being.
Horses live to a different timescale from ours. They tend to be thoughtful beings, weighing things up and exploring them from all angles before deciding what action to take (except of course in the case of instinctive responses to potential threats). Because of this, they are generally better at being in the present moment – with more of an awareness of the wholeness of their being – and they are less ‘in their heads’ than we tend to be. We often want them to respond within our timescales, and with the exact movement, or whatever, that we’re asking for. If this doesn’t happen, we ask again and again until it does, often increasing the volume or adding more energy. How must this appear to these gentle, slower-paced animals…? In fact, when we work with horses, it’s often a case of ‘less is more’ – the quieter and more subtle our signals, the more responsive the horse becomes.
There is much that we can learn from horses in this. Spending time with them and sharing their energy can help us to take on that slower pace, allowing us to let go of the stresses and pressures of our everyday lives in order to find greater grounding and balance. This has huge benefits for our wellbeing.
Saturday 3 November
This morning I went up to give the horses their hay as usual. Dax is always the first to push in for a mouthful, whereas ‘Rika hangs back, knowing that he will move her away if she comes too close. I dropped a few leaves from the bale in one of the feeding spots then, while Dax tucked in, I called ‘Rika to follow me to where I would place some more hay. I left her happily munching while I put out the rest of the hay, then came back to check in with each of them, as I do every morning. ‘Rika was nearest, so I approached her first. Normally she adopts a very defensive stance when I come up to her when she’s eating. On previous days she would tense, become very watchful, put her ears back and sometimes block me with her hindquarters, but today there was none of this. Her ears stayed forward, or tuned in to me, she appeared relaxed and she even turned to say hello. Shortly after this she approached me and accepted some gentle stroking. This is a big change in her behaviour. Nothing earth-shattering maybe, but she definitely appears to be a more settled and engaged horse this morning. I believe that listening to her request for space yesterday, and allowing her to take the time she needed, has helped to build more trust and respect between us. She is such a big-hearted girl and beautiful soul and hopefully she will find contentment here in this wonderful place with us.
Alice Griffin, writing in a recent edition of Horsemanship Magazine (Issue 109), about her time on a horseback tour of the Alentejo region of Portugal, says:
“In this increasingly busy world there are few places that offer a true sense of peace; where roads are empty, passersby rare and where we can truly find a way to switch off and be submerged in nature.”
She noticed that the Alentejan people are
“… often teased for their lackadaisical approach to life, but I can’t help thinking they are all the smarter for refusing to get rushed along by expectation, instead choosing to soak up every moment with deepened relish”
I too, think there is something very special about being able to slow down and reconnect – both with ourselves, and with the animals and nature all around us – and to be able to appreciate the richness and wonder of it all.
Alice goes on to say that:
“Somehow animals – unlike humans – have not lost their ability to be at one with the earth, remaining unchanged in their effortless navigation of rivers, rocks, hills and valleys despite the centuries that may have passed.”
If Portugal isn’t for you at this time, you can still experience a little of this magic of Nature and horses for yourself here in the UK. I offer mindfulness and wellbeing sessions here at our wonderful retreat space in rural Wales, not far from Abergavenny, Wales (map) Just get in touch to find out more:
- 07980 669303
Or take a look at my website: www.equenergy.com