Going round in circles…?

Something that I often hear from clients – and that I’ve felt myself, at times, in my journey with Dax – is a sense of frustration around facing an issue that they thought had been dealt with in the past.

It can be rather disheartening to feel that we’re ‘going nowhere’ or that the actions we’ve taken in the past have been ineffective.  As humans, we like to think that we’re moving forward.  It gives us a sense of achievement and satisfaction and is often a measure by which we determine our sense of self-worth or our self-esteem.

But we often find that, in reality, life is not linear!

Sadly, we can be tempted to give up on our dreams because we feel we’re getting nowhere, we don’t have the skills or we’ll never be good enough, when really we might be SO close to achieving more than we could ever have hoped for!  We need to remember that can’t see what might be just around the corner…

Also, I’ve realised, that we’re not actually going round in circles!  To me, it’s more like a spiral.  The first time we faced the issue, we dealt with one layer, or one aspect of it.  This is what we were ready and equipped to handle at the time and it brought us valuable learning and growth.

The next time the ‘same’ issue presents itself, I would argue that this is, in fact, a new layer or aspect.  We are now ready to delve deeper, learn more and grow further.  Isn’t that wonderful?  Isn’t that a reason to celebrate?  Doesn’t that prove that we have moved forward, and that we have the strength, resilience, inner wisdom and tools to do so again?

When I view things from this perspective I find it a great motivation and inspiration to carry on.  It allows me to trust the process and to believe that things are getting better, even though I might not see it in the moment.  It also opens my mind and imagination to come up with ways to address the issue – which might include people that I can turn to for help and advice, or just a listening ear.  I don’t have to do it all on my own!  Sometimes I can get too close to things and not be able to see all my options, whereas another person might be able to see more clearly and objectively.  And I’ve realised that sharing can help not only me, but the person I share with as well.

So please, if you’re feeling lost, disheartened, frustrated, overwhelmed and tempted to give up, reach out!  Remember that you hold deep resources within you.  You are amazing and wonderful, just like the butterfly!  And, just like the butterfly, you have everything you need right there inside of you!  Sometimes we need help to access these resources, but believe me, they are there.  Often it can help to take a break and do something to nurture yourself, before coming back with fresh eyes to reassess what’s going on.   Then, if you feel it will help you to see your path more clearly, talk things over with someone you trust.  Just remember that you hold the wisdom on what is best for you.  Go with what feels deeply right for you and don’t feel that you have to follow anyone else’s way.


If this has raised any questions for you and you’d like to have a (no obligation) chat, please feel free to contact me:



07980 669303



3 thoughts on “Going round in circles…?

  1. I love hearing others talk honestly about the frustration so many equestrians can feel from time to time. We can be so hard on ourselves! I do better with practice, as most people do, but it can be hard at times to feel like I’m not making the progress I think I should be making. This is a great reminder.


    1. Thank you Heather! I’m very grateful for your feedback. Yes, it’s always good to know that we’re not alone in how we feel. I agree that practice is so important, and affirmation that our approach is valid is very encouraging.


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